Madame: The Journey of a Weight Loss*ista: May 2011

Really? | No Country for Ronald, Bucked Naked Gyms, Paula Deen's Butter Love

1. Your Services are No Longer Needed, Mr. McDonald

Activist are trying to send McDonald's long-time mascot, Ronald McDonald, to Myra's unemployment line from Martin. And, I think it's just silly. As the person behind the Twitter Whale account put it:

I am aware that children are impressionable, but if you remove Ronald, who and what brand or brand's ambassador will be next? Remember, legislation was established to remove toys from the restaurant chain's 'Happy Meal,' in San Francisco, so I guess this was next. When it comes to this issue of childhood obesity, I see a bunch of finger-pointing and blame-placing. When the call to action should be directed at parents and guardians ... not necessarily Ronald. No one clown should have all that power!

2. Take it Off, Work it Out!

We all know how glorious the feeling of de-braing is at the end of the day. Well, Easy Gym located in Arrigorriaga, Spain wants you to have that feeling before you hit their cardio room. In an effort to revitalize the enthusiasm about their full-faceted workout facility, the owners of Easy (lol) Gym decided to turn into a nudist-friendly establishment. The first of its kind, the idea is generating interest in other parts of the World. So, I guess one could say there's going to be an uprising of similar gym models, in the near future? *snickers* Now, I am notorious for looking in the mirror while I'm on the treadmill, you know, to see if anything has changed from 5 minutes ago, when I started running. I also use the visual to get amped about changing some of the things I want to physically improve. So, I guess if you remove clothes, that would be one hell of an added motivator to keep going. On a serious note, I have more questions than answers - mostly involving the hygienic aspect of this. You know ... actually, I'd care not to think about it ... beyond this paragraph. Yeah. Eww.

3. Paulas Have to Stick Together, but I Can't Condone This

Seeing as my name is Paula Jene, I always feel a need to defend this woman and her heart-attacking ways, but I always end up at a loss for words. Ehxibit #ZA409E: Removing butter, from Chef Robert Irvine's abs at the 2011 South Beach Wine & Food Festival. Sigh.

~PC

Eating Clean Without Droppin' Racks on Racks on Racks!

The wave of appreciation for clean eating, or consuming food closest to its natural source, is growing! Food manufactures are gradually beginning to omit artificial substances and restaurants are moving towards utilizing fresh items in their dishes. And while I'm not a full-time clean eater, I think aligning myself with a diet that consisted primarily of non-processed foods - absolutely helped/s boost my weight loss and overall health.

Now, calories, carbohydrates, fat, etc., etc. are all great factors to examine, when focusing on weight loss. However, I think we first should get back to the root of food ... clean eating aka consuming real food - before we even get to that point. God didn't make any mistakes, IMO. And He provided us, naturally, with everything we need to survive on this Earth. As I've said time and time again: Food doesn't need help being food! However, we've allowed corporations (so-called diet brands included) to transform our means of nourishment, to preserve and stretch resources, to save a buck - and to keep us coming back. But what is it costing US in the end?

It's also very unfortunate that an overwhelming perception is that clean items, namely fruits and veggies, are too expensive! Admittedly, I've given many displays of cherries a Nicki Minaj scrunch face, after my eyes scrolled to the per pound price. But I'd wholly implore everyone to dig a little deeper; research, buy in season and local, reassess financial priorities and give it another go!

In a recent video posted by Sean Croxton (founder of Undeground Wellness), he takes a trip with Josh Trent (founder of Wellness Force) to Jimbo's....Naturally, on a mission to buy real food, with only $20 in their wallet. This a great illustration that despite the rise in food costs, diverse and affordable options can still be selected. The point is also driven home that convenience costs! I was absolutely one of those people that would justify buying a family meal from Popeye's, because it was cheaper than going to the store and cooking it myself. When in all actuality, I was really paying more ... for convenience.

I thought it was also cool to see in the video, how simple decisions such as buying your meat from the butcher directly and not in pre-packaged bundles was a save move. Sidenote: Round of a applause for men who go grocery shopping! Thumbs down for that dancing in the beginning, though. o_O

Some other awesome resources for eating clean and real, without breaking the bank are ...

The Gracious Pantry | 5 Tips for Clean Eating on a Budget
A Black Girl's Guide to Weight Loss | 5 Reasons Why You're Spending Too Much on Clean Eating
Clean Eating Club | How to Eat Clean on a Budget

Summer is approaching, let's explore, eat clean and begin/continue to enjoy those flavors that the Earth provides! Umm, and watch our waistlines whittle in the process?

~PC

Raven-Symoné's Weight Loss + Wendy Williams Appearance

When pictures of actress, Raven-Symoné's weight loss transformation hit the web, our jaws dropped ... while she just rolled her eyes. Noted for saying, "I thought I looked fabulous before," the wealthy starlet is still keeping her weight loss discussion to a minimum. Even on her "big sister" Wendy Williams' show. I think "auntie" would've been more appropriate, but I digress.

Well, Raven has received a bounty of criticism for NOT speaking out about the details of her weight loss. Some even ASSume it's because she underwent surgery to achieve her new physique. And these people generally don't know Raven personally and lack medical degrees.

I guess she didn't get the memo that when you're a celebrity and you lose weight - you have to make a spectacle out of it; get a sponsor (or two) and motivate others to do the same. 'Tis your duty! However, I believe she has every right to NOT share the ends and outs of her journey. For some of us, it's a major part of our lives - while others ... it's just weight. She made some life changes and the weight went away. End of story?

She continues to hold true to her initial claims that "less stress" was her method to the shedding of the pounds. And that her diet and exercise (nothing strenuous because she doesn't like to sweat #blackgirlproblems) hasn't changed much. I can live with that - sans throwing shade or demanding more of an explanation.

P.S. I guess this can also be flipped to speak on Jordin Sparks' now infamous bikini twit pic, following her weight loss. I won't post it here - but it's everywhere. I just think you can't win for losing sometimes. People started dogging her because they felt like she was a hypocrite and was rubbing her weight loss in the faces of the plus-size women she left behind. Blah. At the end of the day, whether you're in the limelight or not, all you should be is true to yourself. It's your life, it's your story, it's your journey - not theirs. *shrugs*

~PC

Quotables | Now every girl is expected ...

"Now every girl is expected to have Caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall ass, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, the arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits. The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes."

- Tina Faye

An excerpt from: "Bossypants"

~PC

Mud, Sweat & Tears: My 13-Mile B-Day Run + Food Pics

I had my whole day planned out. Today was going to be a straight up "Pre-Birthday ME DAY!" I needed to go shopping for a gala dress, as my sorority's regional conference is being held here in Columbus, this weekend. I wanted to eat at one of my favorite restaurants - Café Ephesus, a vegan-friendly, Turkish cuisine establishment. And last, but certainly not least, I wanted to run 10 miles. I desired to take my 25th year on this Earth, out with a fierce bang.

So the first part of my 'me day' plans went off without a hitch. The honey forked over his credit card, so that I could make it sprinkle at the mall. I ordered a flavorful salad with some delish rice and fixings. And I went to Highbanks Metro Park. I've never ran/walked this area, but everyone knows it's on the more difficult side of trek environments. The little, flat, punk metro park in our neighborhood don't have nothing on Highbanks. It's located off of a river and has, well, a lot of high banks! I was ready for the challenge though, I could do this.

Mile 1 - 5, flew by. Mile 6, I started to 'feel it.' But it was cool, because I knew I was more than halfway done. Yeah, I do all of the runner-psychological tricks, too, lol. In the midst of convincing myself to press forward, I made it a point to take in all of the astounding beauty around me. I felt like I was in a Disney movie and Bambi was going to hop out at any moment.

So, for the duration of this run, I've been following the bird marker. This is the trail that circles the park and is 10 miles. I get to a point however, that has every trail emblem but my bird! Who killed my ~~mama's~~ bird? What I'm s'posed to do now? Where did I go wrong? I try to think if there was a turn I took, that I shouldn't have - but I'm drawing a blank. While I was in awe of the scenery, chances were that I made a wrong step somewhere.

I don't panic, though. I'm the Queen of getting un-lost! I was still on a trail and in the park. No sweat. My overconfidence kicked in and I started following my inner-compass. My distance tracker reads "Mile 8" - still no birdy though. My tracker then reads "Mile 9," no. damn. birdy! Then I start to hear voices (no, not those kind) and I'm sure that I'm close to a common area. I breathe a mild sigh of relief and keep going on this stranger-ass, non-bird marker trail. But, before I could reach the voices of people and their dogs I hear - I realized that I had to cross a part of the path that was all mud everything! Like many places in the mid-west, it has rained like every day for the past month. I had no choice.

I reluctantly cross the mud - see a parking area and pray to all of the Gods and Native American ancestors (park is known for its NA mounds), that my car is in this lot. Nope. But, I see a map *cue angelic music*. My tracker beeps and reads "Mile 10." Now I'm upset. I've done my 10 miles, that's all I signed up for. Not knowing where I was or how far away from my car I actually was - I started to think the worse. What if I have to run back those same 10 miles I came? My marathon isn't until October, I'm not built for that kind of distance yet. Or what if I'm in a another state? Look, when you're lost in the woods - rationale/logic escapes you.

I could relate to this flower, dis and misplaced.

I hear more voices and see a bunch of happy kids and families just enjoying their day out. Even saw a baby take her milestone first step, while I'm all muddied up, moshing through picnic tables - frowning with my fro shifting from side to side. So, from the map - I see that I went through the damn dog trail! Somehow, I ventured through a sub-trail where the pets were allowed. And from the looks of it, I'm 3 miles off track. Ugh. I dared not go back into the woods - for it had failed me. So I did what I knew would get me somewhere, I started running along the main road. Life lessons learned from the Wizard of Oz ... "follow the yellow brick road!"

While I'm walking down the main road looking like a hitchhiker who got kicked off of a tour bus, the sun comes out. It hits me that I didn't wear any sunscreen, nor did I bring my sunglasses. But I see another common area - I shield my eyes from the rays and keep running. More happy families ... no 525i BMW! I was done - mentally and physically. I find a bench and park it.

I wanted to call Shad, to come rescue me - but the park is a good 25 miles away from our house and then if he would've gotten here, I wouldn't even know how to describe to him where I am. Then I see a park ranger truck - but he zooms by and I guess, didn't see me waving for him. Sucker. There goes my tax dollars speeding down the road, while I'm lost. Then out of nowhere the tears started to flow. Slow, thug tears. But I know I can't just sit there. I have to keep on. I get back on the road. My tracker beeps ... "Mile 11." "Shut up!" Yeah, I yelled at my watch.

I try, in my head to recall the map I looked at a few miles back. I should be near. Keyword - should. And then I see it - a marker with a bird on it! But I didn't care about her no mo' ... below it was a "P" for the parking lot. I noticed a car that looked like the 'PC Mobile,' but I didn't want to get too excited. With my luck, it could've been a someone else's car ... or even a mirage? I dart towards it, see a dent on the front passenger's side (long story - life came at me fast yesterday during rush hour) and plop onto MY hood. I take my last swig of water - I was holding onto it, in case I had to survive in the woods overnight and got back on the road, home.

I know there's probably some moral or higher translation of this experience, to digest, as I finish out another chapter in my life. Something parallel to my weight loss journey, or better yet, my life's journey ... but, I haven't put it together just yet.

Birthday Wish: That it won't rain next Sunday, when I run my 4th (official - this don't count) half marathon. There's nothing fun about mud-running or ruining New Balances!

Breakfast | 1/2 Cup Grapes, 1/2 Cup Raw Almonds, Orange